Gooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaal

If one more person asks me what my goals are for this year, the answer is going to be “to dropkick the next person who asks me what my goals are right through the posts.” I mean, it’s not that I’m angry that people are asking that – I’m excited that there are some people who feel they are at a place where they can set goals again. I’m just… not quite there yet. Maybe I’m jealous of people who are feeling firm enough, solid enough, to set goals?

It’s not that I don’t want to make plans, believe me. There are a ton of things I want to do, want to get done, want to accomplish. So what’s holding me back? I mean, am I the only one wary of committing to getting certain things done? Or do we all have a bit of that? Thanks, 2020. Maybe I just need to make a list? I mean, I’m sitting here, with a brand new computer, in a house I’ve had a connection to for close to twenty years, being present for people I love, and I’m feeling 100% motivated to get things done. I’m just… wary of writing them down and telling someone I’m going to do them. It seems like every time lately I’ve promised something, I’ve fallen behind or dropped the ball or somehow missed the deadline.

Maybe I just need a shower and another cup of coffee.

Through the magic of time dilation, I have taken a shower! No more coffee, though, I’ve had enough. Time for water. Lefty needs a caffeine break!

Now then. Where was I? Oh, right, bitching about the term “goal”. I even googled “why is it hard to set goals in 2021” and y’all, the business posts! I was hoping for maybe a Slate or Lifehacker article on why goal setting is so difficult emotionally right now when everything around is so uncertain, and once again, all I got was pages of “HOW TO CRUSH YOUR BUSINESS GOALS AND BE THE BEST BUSINESS PERSON EVER AND BUSINESS BUSINESS BUSINESS”. Oh for crying out loud. Am I going to have to dig deep into myself and power out a helpful blog post or three about why we’re all gun-shy about setting even the lowest bar of emotional goals right now, how to recover from that, how to relearn how to trust that we can do things we set out to do even when everything around us is chaos? If I can’t find the light, I have to be the light, right?

Stay tuned for my upcoming lectures, How To Commit to Cleaning the Cat Box More Than Once A Week, and Your Laundry Can Get Completed in One Day. Maybe a monthly rotating column on You Won’t Believe This One Trick that Crosses Shit Off Your List and Helps You Over Those Hurdles.

OK, now I’m just rambling.

But seriously, y’all. Everyone I know is somewhere on the chart between tired and exhausted, there never seems to be enough hours in the day, and we all have stuff we want to get done but are somehow never getting to even though we’re always busy. You’d think we wouldn’t be getting shit done because we’re all sitting around watching soap operas and eating bon bons (are soap operas even a thing any more?), but no. We’re not getting shit done because we’re too busy doing shit. How is that even fair?!

After some thought, I think that for me, the trick to setting goals is going to be to stop calling them goals. They’re not resolutions, they’re not goals, they’re things I want to get done. So I should do them.