The one where my chocolate tries to tell me what to do

There are a few disadvantages to working at home (although, as my friend Lucy told me once, “you can’t beat the commute!”). Those disadvantages come from the type of person you are. I’m an only child, so I have that drive to take care of everything because there’s nobody to foist the work onto. I was raised in a house where people where drunk a good portion of the time, so I also feel a responsibility to do it all, because otherwise there’s a very good chance it might not get done (or it might get half-way done and never finished, or not done well, or just stop asking questions and go get me another cold beer, would you?). Mix those two ingredients on high until lightly combined, then add three cups of workaholism, top off with one tablespoon of crazy, and BAKE UNTIL DONE. There. You have the recipe of me.

The disadvantage is that I don’t seem to know when to knock off for the day, and most days I seem to have an unrealistic vision of the number of things which can be accomplished. I can totally start the crock pots at 7 AM and let them heat up while I compile treasuries I’ve been in over the last 24 hours and write a blog post and take a shower! I can totally start dyeing yarn at 8:30 and also get three coats of glaze on this table full of ceramics and get out of the house to meet friends by 4 PM! I can totally also pour a few molds in there, that only takes a few minutes. And I can open them when I get back from hanging out with friends! Also put another coat of glaze on the ceramics, and did I ever put citric acid in with that yarn, it’s been soaking a long time now…

Most days I start, on some level, getting ready for work or puttering at work by 7 AM. I usually make myself stop by 6 PM if I’m making dinner (6:45 if Tim’s making it) and then I might do a couple more things after watching TV. Is that a little excessive….? Don’t answer that. It’s just that there’s so much to be done. I make everything, photograph everything, list everything, package everything, take stock of everything (although I do have to admit I’m not so good with inventory tracking), keep track of supply levels and ordering supplies, communicate with customers, work on advertising, pay bills, balance the checkbook, brainstorm up new items, brainstorm new ideas for old items that don’t sell well, clean up after myself… you get the idea.

But the thing is…? I love it. And that adds to the problem a little. Ultimately, I really enjoy this. I am excited by making enough to have all these hobbies, skilled enough to make them well enough that people want to buy them, and savvy enough to be able to turn that into a business. So maybe it’s 75% that there’s so much to do because I’m the only one that does it… but it’s also 25% I’d rather be doing this that sitting in front of the TV eating bon-bons.

I have, however, been thinking that I need to schedule days off… and that means probably leaving the house for those days off. Or a couple hours off, here and there, to meet friends for ice cream or go to a movie or a park. Being home when not working, but having work all around me is too tempting. Just like those tasty caramel chocolates in the photo. And the crafts I do tell me the same thing, too. Make a list of your dreams. Live your dream.