Has anyone tried turning 2016 off and turning it back on again?

How about putting it in a bag of rice? New batteries? Maybe replace the motherboard? Because this fuckin’ year, y’all.

I read an article somewhere a week or two ago and it was really just a compilation of tweets about how shitty this year has been what with the sniper taking out a good portion of our heroes and role models; it was both funny and sad. I looked for it yesterday so I could link to it and unfortunately all I could find were a bunch of people saying that people complaining about how 2016 has been the worst year ever are all a bunch of cry-babies because they’re pretty sure years like 1939 and 1346-1353 were a lot worse so shut your whiny pie-holes. Ugh. One person’s feelings do not cancel out your own! And pointing out global events like the start of World War II or the Black Plague don’t make you look like you are historically knowledgeable and trying to temper our anger at this year, it makes you look like a pretentious dick.

So then I was going to write a little about Carrie Fisher but everyone else has already done that, so. So I was going to link to a couple of my favorites but as the day went on the articles I was seeing went more from “she made me want to be a self-rescuing princess” to “you people sad about your princess should be sad about GENERAL Leia Organa so you are WRONG and you are NOT A FEMINIST” and jesus fucking christ the internet just makes me so tired sometimes. I think what I’d rather do (than write a post about what Carrie Fisher meant to me) is send a heartfelt email to Billie Lourd (not that I know how to get in touch with her) about what it’s like to lose a parent around the holidays. Because let me tell you that shit will ruin Christmas for a few years.

And also I found out Richard Adams died on Christmas Eve, and he wrote one of my favorite books, if not my very most favorite – Watership Down. I waffled a little bit on saying anything about him because if you know me pretty well you know that’s my favorite book and it would be weird for me to NOT say anything, but then again this year has taken so many good people from us too early, and Richard Adams was an amazing 96 years old and he brought a lot of good into the world so can I really feel cheated when losing someone who got to live so much? Turns out that yes; yes I can feel cheated.

I don’t really have a good way to end this post other than with a quote from Watership Down (and no, it’s not “Silflay hraka!” although this year certainly *can* eat shit). “My heart has joined the Thousand, for my friend stopped running today.” We have all lost a lot of friends this year.


  1. Chris

    We have lost a lot of friends this year. This year can go suck it. If I could, I’d kick it in the crotch (especially with this damn freak of a BOOT on my foot, thank you, 2016) I know there are a lot more horrible things that have happened in the history of the world – but in the history of Me – losing my Mother and my Mother-in-law in less than 8 weeks, among other life changing events that are just fucking piling up – pretty much tops the all time shit-eating suck that has been 2016. 2016 can just kiss my ass. Anyone that tells me to shut my whiny pile hole? Well, they can pucker up and kiss my ass, too.

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